February is for Forgiveness
Forgiveness, in my mind, is one of the most powerful tools we can gift ourselves this lifetime. When we harbor guilt, shame, anger, resentment of another person or experience, we completely and utterly rob ourselves of the NOW MOMENT, the present. I have definitely gone years (yesssss…years) holding onto past experiences/people that, what I felt, created pain, trauma and chaos in my life. I chose to hold onto all of this because I felt I was wronged, I was manipulated, I was betrayed. AND yes it is important to acknowledge our feelings in those moments because at that time they were real. AND what I learned was, the inability to truly forgive (myself and others), manifested in physical pain and mental dis-ease in my life for many many years. All because I was not willing to full-body forgive.
Forgiveness is not always a comfortable thing, especially when it involves a memory, experience and/or person that brings pain to the emotional body. AND, when we hold onto grudges or resentments of emotionally painful memories or events, these events literally stick to/block/clog up our physical body and systems. Anger/resentment clogs the liver and gall-bladder. Worry sits in the spleen. Fear sticks to the kidneys/adrenals. Anxiety lives in the stomach/belly. Grief blocks the lungs. Heart-ache sits in the heart space. Lack of self-love & self-acceptance clogs up the skin organ, resulting in skin irritations and breakouts.
When we take the time to mindfully breathe and forgive OURSELF with love in our hearts, it is much easier to forgive ANOTHER. True forgiveness comes from within, from the Higher Self. Forgiving another certainly does not mean condoning what he or she may have done for you, rather, forgiving his/her soul for the life-lesson you received. Can you change your current lenses to see a situation as a blessing instead of a painful memory? This takes a lot of courage, vulnerability, and even time. So be gentle with yourself, if you are not ready to forgive another start with yourSELF.
Reminder: We are ALL human, we all experience emotions such as anger, resentment, fear, grief, guilt etc. AND we ALL have the ability to shift our narrative, to transform our NOW story. We all have the ability and the RIGHT to forgive ourselves, first and foremost, then, should we be open to, forgive another.
Below is one of my favorite forgiveness practices. It's super simple, yet extremely powerful and in my personal experience, transformational. It is an ancient Hawaiian prayer practice of forgiveness that functions as both a communication concept for reconciliation and a tool for restoring self-love and harmony. I invite you to do this practice for YOURSELF first, because you truly cannot forgive someone else until you've fully forgiven yourself. And when you begin to feel those subtle shifts of forgiveness within, you may want to branch out and use this practice to forgive another.
The Ho'oponopono Practice
Take a deep breath in, hold, then slowly exhale out. Now place one or both hands on your heart space and repeat (in no particular order):
Please forgive me Self (or your name)
I'm sorry Self (or your name)
I love you Self (or your name)
Thank you Self (or your name)
It is up to you how many times you feel you want to repeat this. AND when you are ready to use this practice to forgive someone else, just replace your name or Self with their name. (You can always look at a picture of them when repeating the prayer or imagine an image of this person in your mind).
There is a beautiful song by Mary Isis of this exact Forgiveness prayer called “Ho'oponopono.” For those who have a Spotify account click here to listen or you can click here to watch & listen to her sing a version of it in England's Wells Cathedral.
If you feel called to deepen your practice in an individualized one-on-one session click here to book a private session with me.